This isn't a real post. This is me just needing a moment to vent. I'm trying to find time to thoughtfully prepare some ideas and sort out some important issues, but I keep getting stuck and overwhelmed, so thoughtful will have to wait.
Tonight I'm just tired of mean.
And I'm in tears because while scrolling along on Facebook I came across a video made by some young boys in a school who were taunting another boy and ended up chasing him down a crowded hall and trapping him in a corner. The video ends there, with the boy looking apprehensive and somewhat defiant.
What happened to him? Is he okay? What the hell is wrong with people?
I just can't believe so many people's willingness to be intentionally cruel. That behavior is poisonous. And I feel at the moment as if our society's tolerance for allowing that poison to leach into everything has risen to truly toxic levels.
There is no way to say this without sounding like a clueless Pollyanna, but it's so much better to be kind. And easier, frankly, in the long run. Mean is lazy and ugly and hurts everyone involved.
I'm tired of people gleefully inflicting damage on others. I'm tired of bystanders letting it happen. I'm tired of willful ignorance and lies. I'm tired of flaws too huge to know how to fix. I'm tired of greed. I'm tired of the waves of hopelessness that keep passing over me at unexpected intervals.
I'm tired of crying so much lately. It's also late and I'm probably just plain tired. Maybe in the morning something will be better.